Sunday, May 27, 2018

Spanko Brunch 2.0 #229


The table is set, the food is hot, and the guests are here for our regular discussion, but first a public service announcement. If you use Blogger, you will by now have noticed that you no longer receive email notifications of comments on your blog. This is likely due to the new implementation of the warning about cookies that Blogger has put on all blogs. There is no relation between the two, but often one feature breaks when another is added or fixed. The technicians are aware of this problem and are working on it. Now back to our regularly scheduled spanking.

Spankings happen for many reasons, and today I'd like to talk about spankings that are just plain fun, whether that was the original intention or not.

Do you ever experience spankings that contain an element of fun? What specific things happen to make it fun, and are they intentional or spontaneous?

Leave your response as a comment, and I will publish a summary of our discussion once everyone has had a chance to speak.
From Hermione's Heart

Saturday, May 26, 2018

You Completed the Caption

Baxter: Ewww. ruining a great gallery of sexy spankable bottoms with what again?

Windy's husband: "I'll have 5 Pringle sandwiches to go, and a diet coke."

Simon: This will probably only make sense to British readers but here we go,
"even Gary Lineker thought the latest advertising campaign had overstepped the mark".

Rosco: Grand Prize Winner: Wasted Opportunities Photo Contest

These girls were sorely disappointed.

The Explorer: ready to begin....

KDPierre: Anthony Bourdain demonstrates a new twist on the "sweet & salty" snack craze.

Sir Wendel: First one that drops their chip gets a spanking.

Ronnie: When the girls applied for the new crisp ad, they didn't expect this.

Hands63: Lays potato chips, bet you can’t eat just one.

Red: I keep staring and staring, but cannot think what to say... Maybe I should look a little longer for inspiration.

Kingspan: My object all sublime
I shall achieve in time —
To let the punishment fit the crime —
The punishment fit the crime;
And make each naughty girl bent
Unwillingly represent
A source of innocent merriment!
Of innocent merriment!

All lazy, dull society sinners,
Who will not “chip in” with chores,
Shall first get a chip in
And then get a whippin’
So they shall sit no more. …

Bonnie: "When they asked me to chip in, I didn't quite envision this"

Hermione: Fred enjoyed gambling in Vegas, and especially liked the new chip dispensers.
From Hermione's Heart

Friday, May 25, 2018

Friday FAIL


As bloggers, we all get our share of spam comments. Blogger and other blogging platforms are pretty efficient at detecting spam and isolating it in a separate folder instead of allowing it to be published.

Here are some of the doozies that I found in my Spam folder recently. They'll really make you scratch your head.

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Wasn't that fun?

Thursday, May 24, 2018

Complete the Caption

What's up here? Is it some sort of adult party game? Are those Pringles he's...er...inserting? Have we crossed the line?

Complete the caption—if you dare—by leaving a comment, and I will publish whatever you come up with on Saturday.
From Hermione's Heart

Tuesday, May 22, 2018

From the Top Shelf - Naval Discipline

Today I have a treat for you. It's one of the late Alex Birch's stories, which at one time was a running narrative for a series of very juicy illustrations. Alas, the pictures are lost, so you must use your imagination to picture the scene.

A Lesson in Naval Discipline

"You wanted to see me, Chief?"

"Let's start by getting my form of address right, Driscoll. It's CHIEF PETTY OFFICER STEWART when you get an official summons to my quarters, understand?! And yes I most certainly do want to see you!"

(Oh Christ, he's found out!)

"You were on morning watch at three bells, were you not, Driscoll? So why did Johnson stay on watch an extra half hour...because you weren't there! Explain!"

(Blushing) "I'm-I'm sorry Chief Petty Officer Stewart. I-I overslept. It-it won't happen again."

(Angry) "...And it's the third time, Driscoll! There are those of us, Driscoll, who objected to having a bunch of Mollies on board ship in the first place. Makes the men horny and the discipline gets slack. And you are the worst possible advertisement!"

(Hangs head) "I'm truly sorry, Chief Petty Officer Stewart.

"Do you know I should put you on a charge, Driscoll? Clap you in irons until your court martial comes up. And you'll know from Queens Regulations—if you'd ever read 'em—you will be stripped to your underwear while you're locked up for the rest of the voyage, for your own safety. Self harm and all that!" (That'll scare the silly cow!)

"Oh please, Chief Petty Officer, give me another chance! (Tearful) Please don't report me!"

"Very well, Driscoll, I might give you another chance if you're a good girl. Have you seen one of these before?"

"Y-yes Chief Petty Officer, (Oh my God!) it's a cane."

"Well that's your option, Driscoll. A good caning unofficially here in my quarters or put on report. What's it to be? I'll cure you of this slovenliness one way or the other!"

"Oh please, not the cane!"

"Very well. Then I will call for Johnson and Lambert to escort you to..."

"NOOOO ! I'll do it! I'll take the caning"

(Laughs) "I thought you'd see sense. Now turn and face the stool!"

"First of all, Driscoll, I'm sure you agree we are in a novel situation here...normal protocol suspended...and for the next half hour or so, you will address me as 'Sir' Is that clear?"

"Oh, yes Sir." (Why does it give me a little tingle to say that?)

"Go on girl, get bent over it!"

"Yes Sir. Please don't hurt me, Sir."

(Chuckles). "Wouldn't do you much good if I didn't, would it Driscoll?"

(Trembles) "No Sir, I suppose not."

"Right. Now get that skirt up!"

"My skirt, Sir? Oh no, please, when I agreed I thought......"

"...I was going to cane you through a thick layer of cotton. Well think again, Driscoll! Get it up NOW!"

(Whispering) "I-I can't, Sir, I just can't!"

"Have you got something under there other women haven't, Driscoll? Come on, I've seen what's under a woman's skirt before. Hurry up and obey..and here's a little incentive!"

CRAAAAACK!!

"Aaaaaaaaaahhhhhh"

"Now get on with it!"

(Smug and sarcastic) "Ah I see I had it arse about face, Driscoll! Now I see why you were so coy! You haven't got what all other women on this ship SHOULD have! You've got no panties on. Would you care to explain this breach of Queen's Regulations for Female Naval Personnel?"

(Blushing) "The-the ship is so hot, Sir, and when I have to work below decks, I get uncomfortably warm around my..around my...." (voice trails off in embarrassment)

(Wry amusement) "So you get a bit sticky down around the old welcome mat do you? Well what a shame! I'm sure all the lads on board will be leaving their jockeys off once this gets around? Equal opportunity and all that! Is this common among you ladies, Driscoll? Should we have a full, on deck, uniform inspection of all the girls?"

(Almost tearful) "I-I don't know Sir. Please, Sir, don't..."

"Well this further little piece of dumb insolence is going to add to your allotment, Driscoll. Get right over!"

"Aaaaaaaahhhhh, please Sir, that hurt!" (squeals loudly)

"Well what a surprise, Driscoll. Did it really? I had no idea. Of course I suppose it would just through that thin pantyhose. That'll teach you not to leave your panties off!"

"Aaaaaaaaaaaaahhhh...oh please, Sir, stop, my bottom is burning."

"My God, what are we breeding in the modern navy? Young sailors used to be strapped over a gun for fifty lashes of the cat at one time, Driscoll. You've had three cane strokes on your bottom and you're howling like a baby!"

(Tearful) "Yes, Sir, I'm sorry, Sir."

"Still as you've remembered your respectful form of address so far, maybe I can see my way clear to giving your bottom a bit of relief from the heat."

(Relieved sigh) "Oh thank you, Sir."

"That's quite alright, Driscoll. It suits me down to the ground to get some air to your bottom. Take your pantyhose down!"

"Oh please Sir, NOOOO!"

"Another refusal to obey a command and I'll add strokes!"

"Y-Yes Sir"

"Oh Sir please don't stare at me like that!"

"Don't tell me what to do, just bend over that stool again!"

(I know this is awful, but he looks so sexy and stern. I'm getting horny waiting for the cane with my bottom bare. He can see EVERYTHING!"

"Now you can give me a naval report, Driscoll. Tell me how much sharper it feels without your hose on!"

CRAAAAAAAAAAACK!

"Aaaaaaaaaaaaahhh. Oh my God, Sir, it's awful. It's like a burning ember on my bottom."

"Excellent analysis, Driscoll. You might make a useful member of Her Majesty's Navy yet! Now get further over that stool. Lie right across it. I want your bottom right up in the air."

"That's it, girl. See you CAN obey orders if you work at it."

"Oh please Sir, (sobbing now) how many more? My bottom is roasting!"

CRAAAAAAACK!

"That's for your cheek, Driscoll. Two more cane strokes but don't think that's the end of your punishment!"

"Right, Driscoll, that's the end of your caning. Still alive, aren't you, for all that whining and bleating?"

"Yes Sir, I'm-I'm sorry Sir."

"Well I don't think that's enough. You need to be taught a good lesson. You are a serving sailor, not a little girl who sleeps in on a Saturday until mommy wakes her up. Is that clear, Driscoll?"

(whispers tearfully) "Yes Sir."

"Good. We agree that you have behaved like a spoilt child and you deserve a spoilt child's punishment. So you can start by getting all your clothes off. Come on! Naughty girls get spanked in the nude, Driscoll!"

(Submissively) "Yes, Sir. Whatever you say, Sir."

"D-Do I have to do this in front of you, Sir?"

"You most certainly do, Driscoll! It's called a test of character!"

"T-This is really humiliating, Sir."

"Really? Well maybe you won't oversleep in future. Get on with it!"

"Don't try delaying tactics, girl. You'll only get more when you're over my knee if I lose patience!"

"S-sorry Sir, my skirt zipper's stuck."

"Well hurry up or I'll rip it off!"

"I'm trying, Sir...ah there...done it...do I really have to take my shirt off too?"

"Everything, I said. Mind you you can leave your hat on. Might remind you that you ARE in the Navy! Something needs to!"

"Ah now isn't that lovely. I must admit you have quite a beautiful figure, Driscoll! You're certainly not a little girl after all, are you?"

(Looks embarrassed). "Please don't say things like that. I've never done this in front of a man before, Sir. I'm so ashamed."

"And so you should be, my girl! Not for being naked in front of me but for breaking another of the Queen's Regulations vis a vis underwear. You're not wearing a bra either!"

"I never do Sir, I- I hadn't realised..."

"Because you don't study regulations, my girl and for that you will be punished severely. I was just going to hand spank you but now I'll take a slipper to your bottom!"

"Oh no, please! Not after my caning. My bottom..."

"...is very sore no doubt—and about to get worse. Now come here and lie across my lap!"

"AAAAAHHHH! Oh my God. Please, Sir, that really hurts!"

"Of course it does. Especially on top of those cane stripes—and it's going to hurt a lot worse before I've done with you!"

"Please, Sir, if you stop this I'll do anything for you—and I mean anything!"

"You cheeky little tart! A minute ago you were pleading your innocence about stripping in front of me and now you're offering sexual favours. I'll add a few more for that!"

"AAAAAAAAAAHHH! Oh, no more please, Sir. My bottom is scalding hot."

"And so it should be, you little trollop. I'll teach you to try and seduce a superior. Take that...and that!"

"OWWWWWW BOO HOO "

"Stop your bleating and lie further over. Come on, get that nice big bottom right up."

"Oh Sir, This is degrading. You're treating me like a naughty child. This is worse than being caned."

"Yes, I thought you might feel slightly embarrassed, Driscoll, in this position. But you'll have to learn to take it with a stiff upper lip. You're in the British Navy!"

"Oh dear God, please Sir, stop! I'm burning up. I can' t take any more. OWWWWWWWWWWWW"

"You are strange creatures, Driscoll, you women. I believe you are in quite a bit of distress, but I can see quite clearly that one part of you is becoming very moist!"

(Oh God he can see that? I will never recover from the shame of this)

"But as I'm sure you can feel, Driscoll, you're not the only one becoming aroused. And I think I've beaten you enough. Stand up and face me!"

"You are quite a pretty sight, Driscoll, with a face almost as red as your bottom. And you shave so neatly down there."

"Oh please, Sir, don't make comments like that. You are humiliating me."

"Indeed I am, Driscoll, but I have let you off about 15 minutes of intended punishment so consider yourself lucky!"

"I-I'm very grateful, Sir."

"Are you indeed, my girl. Just how grateful would that be?"

"I-I don't know what you mean, Sir."

"Well seeing as you made an offer less than ten minutes ago you should know exactly what I mean. I'm sure you're not that stupid. You are aware that the Navy is called 'The Senior Service', Driscoll? Well here is one Senior who needs servicing very urgently. So get to it or you'll find the cane across your bottom again!"

(Licks her lips in anticipation) "OH SIIIIIIRRRRRRR!"

From Hermione's Heart

Monday, May 21, 2018

Recap: Spanko Brunch 2.0 for May 20

Today is Victoria Day, when we Canadians celebrate the birthday of Queen Victoria as well as the birthday of our present monarch, Queen Elizabeth. Happy birthday, ma'ams!

Now on to our question of the week: do you write about spanking?

Windy: Up until recently, I was just reading romance novels, some with spanking type stuff, some not. I preferred to read fiction.

Then about 2 months ago, I was reading real blogs by ladies with dd/ttwd type personal stories because I found them through your site, H and Bonnie's. And for the first time, I commented here anonymously, then signed up a week later just to contribute to your Captions and Brunches, as you know. Almost two weeks ago, I started my own blog and joined the ttwd community. So now I am sharing my true stories that often include some aspect of spanking.

GREAT question!!!

Welcome to blogging, Windy! I have added you to my blogroll.

Baxter: I have written quite a bit of my own fiction, based loosely upon real events as the starter and then the fiction takes off from there. I have never shared it. I also love to read spankng stories, real or fiction and enjoy those that give me signifiant arousal.

KDPierre: I've done a bit of writing as you well know. ;-)

Some of my stories are fictionalized accounts of actual events. Others are fictional plots with characters based directly on people I know. And others are total fiction, but written with firsthand experience in how ttwd works in real life.

All of my stories can be found on my website that is linked through my blog and most of my stories are also on the Library of Spanking Fiction.

Amy: I have our blog and I've done a couple of Fantasy Fridays with PK. I write mostly about Eric and me, though when he travels I'll do some fictional stuff to make the time go by.

Roz: I am more of a reader. The only writing about spanking I have done has been on my blog.

arched one: I have written spanking letters to my wife, she enjoys reading them and usually comments on them. Reading spanking stories, I prefer real life or fantasy written well so one could believe it could happen in real life. I also prefer women spanking me (as my wife spanks me) to get the males' feelings on being spanked and why they accept spanking. Some real good stores also give the wife/girlfriend's view on why they spank.

Anon 1: The pictures of F/m spankings I write as if it was I being spanked. With [pictures of[ older women I can come up with more stories. Trying to come out I’ve tried, no luck.

Anon 2: The person who spoke of F/m spanking I wish to add this. I'm seeing a mature woman, do not have the nerve to bring up my desire. We have great sex, but if I could tell her of my spanking desires it would be totally wonderful. I cannot explain this desire, had it for as long as I can recall. I find pictures on different blogs of mature women spanking. It is those pictures with that look a woman has, it is the look of the one being spanked that get my attention. If there is room on the picture I will put my story on the picture, if not will attached and then write my story. It is always told with the mature woman speaking and me responding. The best ones are when the woman tells me that I must call her "Mommy", since Mommies spank naughty little boys. I have a collection hidden in the bathroom, one that I really get enjoyment is of a woman spanking me, then standing, rubbing, my shorts and underpants around my ankles and she is hold my penis saying "are you going to play with that again husband of mine, or should I be the Mommy and spank you for being a naughty little boy, I say I'm sorry and she sternly tells me to face the wall, no rubbing, talking and if someone drops in, better not move, or will get a spanking in front of that person. We all have our sexual desires, this is the safe way for me, so if I need to masturbate to fill this desire I do, it is not hurting anyone. The sexual fantasy at its best is what is in your mind. You asked the question I answered it, and coming out, to admit I sit on the toilet, naked, looking at F/m pictures and reading what i wrote or looking and coming up with the story while I masturbate, I don't think one can be more open and replying to what you asked.

Thank you for your honesty and openness.

Leigh: Yeah I've written about spanking a time or two.

Anon 3: I am currently writing a story that starts with me in everyday autobiographical life and eases into fantasy. I have a long way to go on it and have not shared it with anyone. I prefer reading real life stories.

Ronnie: As you know I have a blog and write about the spankings I get from my nearest and dearest. I've done one or two fictional stories for PK's Fantasy Fridays.

Yorkie: I write about my own experiences plus some fantasy stories. I put some of my stories up on some forums that are now defunct and nowadays only my wife reads them. She prefers my recollections of the spankings she gives me as she loves to know about my feelings and what I'm thinking.

Rosco: So much to say here. Mostly I like to read stories that are at least sort of believable. But my own fantasies are not that realistic and generally involve lack of explicit consent.

When my wife and I engage in this stuff, I certainly pretend it is for real. Asking her "to spank me harder" would diminish the mood.

I haven't written much but think about doing my own website often. There are several reasons why I have not:

1. I would really hate to get caught - especially by my (grown) kids.
2. People don't seem very interested in reading stuff from a male submissive.
3. Some of my stories/fantasies emanate from my youth. I worry about legal and social repercussions of writing such stories.

Hermione: Since this is a blog about spanking, then the answer would have to be "yes". If you search the archives, you will find that over the years I have written less and less about my own spankings. This is largely because the occurrence has become a routine in our home, and there isn't a lot that is different or blog-worthy from week to week. Describing each one would become repetitious. But I do enjoy reading other bloggers' true accounts of their own percussive activities.

I enjoy reading spanking fiction but find it very difficult to write, and have only produced a handful of fictional stories.

Thank you all for joining in the discussion this week!
From Hermione's Heart

Sunday, May 20, 2018

Spanko Brunch 2.0 #228

Welcome, dear readers, to a very special royal wedding brunch. I know there are many of you who are bloggers, and there are many more who do not have blogs but enjoy reading about spanking here. There is much creative energy out there that never sees the light of day. This week's topic is open to all, whether you blog or not.

Do you ever write about spanking? If so, do you prefer to write about your own real-life experiences, or do you write about fictional characters and situations. Have you ever written down your own secret fantasies? Do you share your writing with others or is it private? If you don't write, do you prefer to read about real spankings or fictional ones?

Please feel free to join in and express your preferences by leaving a comment. You may remain anonymous if you wish. I will publish a summary of our discussion once everyone has had a chance to speak.
From Hermione's Heart